It seemed like such a good idea at the time. Whether it was texting a photo of your naughty bits (known as 'sexting') or having an online mutual-masturbation sesh with a sexy stranger, it was just supposed to be a bit of technology-aided fun, right? But now your bitter ex has uploaded a photo of your nipples/willy. Or maybe a video of you 'appreciating yourself' has made you a YouPorn superstar. Panicking that your mum/boss/new lover is going to find the naked truth? Read on.

Safe webcam sex

Web cam sex is visual, personal and therefore more of a turn-on than old-fashioned phone sex. But you have to be careful when dabbling in it - some programmes allow users to record what's happening on their desktop without your knowledge. So your private performance could be kept and broadcast over the net for all on sundry to view. Gulp.

If you're going online to have web sex or you're sexting your partner, learn how to deal with the situation if things go wrong.

"People think internet sex is an immediate thing but it has long-term consequences," says Jennifer Perry, an E-crime expert. "I've helped victims who've been blackmailed by professional scammers using recording software. People have a sexual encounter online and, before they know it, they have to pay this stranger money, or perform sex acts on them to prevent the encounter being uploaded for all to see."

There are simple ways you can have cybersex safely.

• Don't show your face. Ever. Position the webcam so all the action is neck-down only.
• Set up a personal persona for web-sex that's in no way related to you and only use that account for that purpose.
• Change your name and account regularly.
• Don't give out ANY personal details and avoid having multiple sessions with the same person. We don't want to worry you, but professional scammers may be able to 'jigsaw' together your identity over time and then target you.

Safe sexting in relationships

When you're in love you never think your relationship is going to end. So surely there's no harm in taking a saucy picture of your boobs/willy and firing it off to your other half? The problem is, some relationships end, sometimes bitterly. And bitter + sexy photo of you + internet connection is a dangerous combo.

Jennifer Perry recommends organising a 'digital breakup' to ensure certain photos don't resurface. "When you break up with someone you should organise a time to meet up, sit down, and delete all intimate texts, photos and videos from your phones or computer in front of each other," she says.

Removing naked photos/videos

So the worst has happened and there's a chance everyone and their dog will soon see you in all your unclothed digital glory.

It goes without saying that you need to contact the person who posted the material and demand they take it down. Report the image or video immediately to the website in question, and untag yourself in any photos so they're not connected to you.

Do you know what to do if a rude photo/video of you appears on the web?

If that doesn't work, there's more you can do, but the following steps should be taken carefully and with advice from a legal professional.

If you were under 18 when the footage was taken the law considers it a paedophilic image. Even keeping it on his/her computer/phone counts as 'possession', and texting it to a mate or posting it online counts as 'distribution'. These are serious crimes with hefty jail sentences, so often just a scary-sounding letter from a solicitor is enough to get a rogue upload taken down. A solicitor may also advise that you claim Performer's Rights to get offending images removed.

And if you were over 18? "It's hard to prove you were definitely over 18 when a photo or video was made. Therefore, it's worth contacting the site directly and claiming the images are child pornography - even if they weren't," says Jennifer. "Tell them you're going to call the police unless they take them down."

Think carefully before you make any threats, though. Labelling someone a paedophile carries serious consequences and therefore the recipient could react badly, perhaps becoming violent or threatening. It's not worth putting yourself in danger.

Appealing to the website owners' softer side might be a better approach initially. "Often just pleading 'I was young and stupid, please take it down' will get the images removed," says Jennifer. "The more you talk to the website owner yourself, the better."

Updated: 19/09/2011

Holly Thompson