What's in a French kiss?

A kiss can be all things to all people. The way the Pope puckers up for the tarmac is a world away from the kind of sensual snog that makes your toes curl and blood pressure soar. French kissing, as the latter is often called, is a bit of a misleading term, because it wasn't like our Gallic neighbours invented the technique and you don't need to be fluent in French to qualify. Whether it comes naturally, or with a little practice, a French kiss can say more about your feelings than a volume of love poetry. Things might have been less confusing had it been called Tongue Kissing, but then where's the romance and the passion in that?

When to kiss someone

Don't reserve snogs for the end of the date. If you're comfortable with the person you're kissing, and there's a degree of trust between you, then bring it on beforehand - even out of the blue if it suits. Let's face it, there's nothing sexier than having your other half pucker up without being prompted.

Do they want to kiss you?

So you're up for a full-on kiss, but how can you be sure they will return the gesture and not freeze up or pull away? Start your move with some eye contact, glance at their mouth and back again, and see how they respond. If they stop blinking, and remind you of impending roadkill, it may be a good idea to back off, but if they mimic your gesture then crack on to the next stage.

How to kiss

OK, your mouths need to be open during a French kiss, so your tongues can connect, but don't take this too literally, and steam in like a beached fish gasping for air. The urgent bit kicks in later, once your lips have brushed together and it's clear your other half wants to take things further. (Just read their lips, because if they seem content to keep the kiss at this stage then don't be tempted to take it any further).

Tongues

Think of your tongue as an explorer in unknown territory. Now, you wouldn't just strut in and hope for the best, would you? No, you'd take it step-by-step, advancing ever so slowly, testing your surroundings and marvelling at the new sensations it brings. As for the native tongue you discover with your own, try to reflect they way it behaves towards you. If you find it hiding at the back, then you've probably overstepped the mark, but if it meets you half way, and wants to play, then simply follow your instinct and desires.

How to breathe

People often stress out about how to breathe during a passionate kiss, and the simple answer is through your nose. With practice, you'll find it's possible to inhale and exhale through your mouth by taking advantage of any breaks, and in some ways that's the key to good kissing. It isn't an endurance event, after all, and if you finish before you've exhausted the moment then you can be sure they'll soon come back for more.

Updated: 28/05/2012