No strings attached
Question
My girlfriend wants us to be able to have sex when she's on her period. I haven't got any hang-ups about it in principle but I just wanted to know if it's safe or not. It struck me that taking her tampon out and then having sex with her might not be that clean. Can you tell me if having sex like this would cause any problems or not?
Answer
Whether or not to have sex with your girlfriend when she is on her period is a matter of personal choice. Some people do feel having sex with someone who is on their period can be messy and this is the main reason some people don't do it. But this doesn't worry other people and they do have sex when the woman is on her period.
It is important to ask yourself if this is something you feel comfortable with and not to feel pressurised into doing something that you're not happy with, or ready for. If you do feel comfortable with the idea then you might want to have a chat with your partner about what you would like as well as what she would like. Communication is an important part of getting pleasure when engaging in any sexual activity.
It's worth remembering that despite the myths, it's still possible for a woman to become pregnant if she has sex whilst on her period. Every woman's menstrual cycle is different and it may change from month to month. Technically, a woman is more likely to conceive at a particular stage in the menstrual cycle but it's impossible for a woman to be sure of when she will next ovulate. Stress, exercise, change of diet, and ill health are just some of the things that can effect a woman's menstrual cycle. You should also be aware sperm can live in the woman's body for up to seven days, so it's high risk to have sex up to seven days before ovulation.
There is a risk of pregnancy if sperm comes into contact with the vagina in any way including from sperm on fingers. The penis also leaks a few drops of semen (liquid containing sperm) as soon as it's hard, so there is a risk of pregnancy if the penis enters the vagina, even if the man doesn't ejaculate.
To reduce the risk of pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections (STIs) you should use condoms when you have sex with your girlfriend. You can get free condoms from your local Brook Centre or family planning clinic. Advice is given in confidence and contraception will be free. You can also buy condoms from a chemist and other retail outlets.
Updated: 22/06/2005
Question answered by YouthNet in association with Brook
