Community: Real Life

Annoying eaters


Meghan

Meghan, 20, is interning at YouthNet while studying in London for the semester. She studies journalism and political science in Arizona.

We all know them - people who slurp and smack their way through their food. It's time to take a stand.

Every morning I awake to the sound of my roommate eating. It doesn't matter if it's cereal, fruit, or the ostensibly quiet pancakes. She crunches and munches her way through breakfast, completely unaware of the fact that her eating has woken up the entire flat. Her affliction, as my other roommate and I have deemed it, is that she is a noisy eater. Face it, we all know one. Or ten. I see it (or rather, hear it) everywhere: in my apartment, at lunch with friends, at family gatherings or while sitting next to random strangers on the tube.

There are several types of annoying eaters, but the most common offenders consist of the following:  slurpers, chompers, smackers and those who make some sort of noise after every bite (ahhhhh).

Slurpers can be found abusing liquids, be it drinks, soup, or any other sloppy substance. They are guilty of making sure they get every last drop which results in that awful sound. To a normal person, the last bit of milk left over from a bowl of cereal means nothing. Slurpers see this as an opportunity. The chompers are the ones who chew their food loudly, apparently taking a leaf out of a cow's book. You can often hear it from rooms away. I've found that the smackers are most commonly found chewing gum. They chew it with mouth open, popping and smacking to their hearts content (and my discontent). And finally, the people who feel the need to make a noise or comment after eating. They really want to let you know they are enjoying their meal. I have experience with this breed in particular.

If having an annoying eater for a roommate wasn't already bad enough, it really started to get to me at work over the summer. I shared a desk with a guy who clearly felt it was necessary to let me know he was satisfied with his food by moaning happily after each bite. Every few minutes for the entire lunch hour, I was privy to his "mmms" and "ahhhs". We get it - your lunch is good. That's not something the whole office needs to know. It got to the point where it became a distraction. I was trying to get work done, but found it hard to concentrate over my co-workers lunchtime chorus.

We get it - your lunch is good. That's not something the whole office needs to know.

Coincidently, shortly after I left the job (surprisingly enough, not because of the guy I shared my desk with) I read a study in the newspaper that claims obnoxious eaters not only drive their co-workers crazy, but also reduce workplace productivity. According to the survey, those who eat at their desk and have a working lunch typically have less energy as the day goes on. While I get that some people may not have time for a lunch break, in the case of my desk mate, an occasional lunch outside of the office would have been much appreciated.

The worst part is most annoying eaters aren't even aware of their habit. They always seem completely oblivious to the death stares they receive whenever they whip out that apple or sandwich. However, this seems to be one of those things that nobody talks about. It's like telling somebody that they smell bad. We all know who the annoying eaters are but never say anything to them about it. I've come across dozens of annoying eaters throughout my life, but have never had the guts to point it out to them. It's awkward. Instead, I just sit silently trying not to strangle the person.

So what causes it? Bad manners? Is being a noisy eater some kind of innate habit? I spent a lot of time considering this at work this summer, but have come to the conclusion that we may never know. The bottom line is that I don't want to hear your food. Ever! If you're unfamiliar with what I'm talking about, maybe it's time to re-evaluate. You could be one of them.


Updated: 17/10/2011


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