Dealing with depression
Question
When I was younger I was verbally bullied badly and became depressed. One teacher picked up on it but said she wanted me to work my own way through it and that over time I had seemed happier.
The thing is, I'm still finding that I have a really low self-esteem and think negatively most of the time. I get stressed over my school work, cry and then depress myself again. Can I do anything to make myself feel better? I haven't told my mum how bad the bullying was and I don't want to upset her by telling her everything now, but I also don't want to keep feeling negative about myself.
Answer
It sounds like the bullying you experienced had a large impact on your emotional wellbeing. It must be hard to feel so upset, stressed and negative about things, but you don't have to go through this on your own.
You may find it helpful to spend some time looking at the possible reasons why your self-esteem is very low at the moment. Being bullied at school must have been a very upsetting time for you. The emotional impact bullying can have on your confidence can be great, even some time after it happened. It's understandable you feel perhaps you aren't over the experience yet and that the depression is still affecting you.
Sometimes it helps to talk about how you are feeling. If you would like to talk to someone about the way the bullying you went through has had an impact on your life, Connexions Direct is an online and telephone information, support and advice service for young people. You can call the helpline on 0808 0013 219.
It might also be worth talking to your local doctor (GP) about how you've been feeling. They will be able to explore the different types of support available to you. Perhaps a talking therapy, such as counselling, would benefit you further. A trained counsellor or therapist will be able to help you to identify any underlying issues you may have which could be contributing to your situation.
If you wish to seek some support independently, Youth Access has a search engine on its website that will allow you to search for a local service.
Sometimes opening up to family and friends about how you feel can help. It is understandable you would prefer to keep things from those you are close to for fear of upsetting them, but often when people know the situation they are able to gain greater understanding and offer help and support.
At times, it can seem easier to talk to someone you do not know. If you don't feel ready to speak to your mum about the way you have been feeling, you can speak to a counsellor at Careline on 020 8514 1177.
Alternatively, SANELINE is a national mental health helpline offering confidential emotional support and information to anyone experiencing mental health problems. It can give you the time and space to talk about the depression you have been going through without judging you or telling you what to do. If you feel this could help. You can call the helpline on 0845 767 8000.
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