Confidence boost
Question
I have no confidence and I have no idea what I'm good at in life. People say I should play to my strengths but how am I supposed to do that when I don't know what they are? Feeling like this makes me anxious and then I feel even less confident in myself. Is there anything I can do help feel more confident?
Answer
There are ways to feel better about yourself and gain confidence.
Surrounding yourself with positive people who value you can help to remind you of your self worth. Talking with people you respect and trust - such as family, friends and colleagues - can be a good way of reminding yourself about your positive points and past accomplishments.
Doing something you are interested in such as sport, music, writing etc can make you feel good because not only are taking your mind off feeling bad, but you are also accomplishing something. Of course if you cannot think of a particular hobby or activity you are interested in, then you could try something totally new.
Keeping busy with an activity can help remind you of your strengths or passions, while discovering something you are good at is great for building confidence. Participating in an activity with others can also be a great way of meeting like-minded people.
It's important that you are not hard on yourself. Give yourself time to relax and do things you enjoy. Exercise is also important, as it gives you positive endorphins and helps you to de-stress.
Although its easy to say, try not to be self-critical, or focus on negative aspects all the time. If you have anxieties that are holding you back then see if you can work through them - whether on your own or with the help of others - otherwise you may have to simply let them go.
I wonder if you've ever thought about talking to a professional such as a counsellor about how you are feeling. They could give you further advice on how to deal with anxieties, boost your confidence, and help you recognise that you are a great person.
Again, when it comes to thinking about your aims, maybe you would benefit from talking with someone you don't know. Whether you are referring to specific career aims or simply your general direction in life, talking to someone such as a counsellor can help you get a clearer picture.
You can read more about self esteem in the building self-esteem article on this site (see the related links on the left)
Of course if you ever feel you need to talk to someone straight away you could contact Samaritans. They are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week on 08457 90 90 90 or email jo@samaritans.org. You can speak to them in total confidence about anything that is troubling you.
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Question answered by bss
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