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Black or brown sludge?


Sabrina

We chart the ups and downs of fabulous fresher Sabrina as she trains to be a doctor.
Entry: 4

TheSite.org follows fabulous fresher Sabrina as she trains to be a doctor, and ends up on the operating table herself.

My apologies for not updating for so long, I've literally been sucked in, so to speak. I'll start with the follow-up to my tongue op. I saw the consultant and he wants me to have more surgery. During the consultation I had three medics peering into my mouth, all quite bizarre as the hospital is one of UCL's teaching hospitals. I also had to have an MRI scan at the hospital where I have a clinical placement once a week. It's amazing how differently they treat you when they know you're one of them. You're suddenly expected to appreciate how the system works, and the pressure they're under, and know all the complicated names to whatever condition you have. Although it has its advantages, it's a little weird knowing that you're never really going to be treated in quite the same manner again.

No news on the breast op, which is good because at this point in time, it won't clash with important exams but does leave my future quite uncertain. I was pleased to see that the recent TV documentary Cosmetic kids featured a breast reduction. It's not something you hear about a lot, despite celebs like Christina Ricci and Drew Barrymore having them done, but it can literally change someones life. Fingers are still crossed for a date to come through, though I do have nightmares of getting there and getting the proverbial finger from a surgeon saying, "Nope, you're too young, come back once you've had some children" or something to that effect.

"Life in halls is still fun. Despite the early-morning fire alarms and revolting food"

Despite slightly ranting on my last entry about some of the other medics, things have calmed down. It's actually quite nice knowing that everyone is a little different, even if sometimes those little differences make you want to throw your head back and scream. Our course has been getting more intense recently and it's interesting to see how your colleagues deal with stress. I tend to (badly) gym or (even worse) dance my stresses away but I do worry about my friends who drink away their problems. Don't get me wrong though, I'm not writing them off as potential alcoholics, they know the risks and all that, but it's not easy seeing your friends not being able to stand properly, then watch them having to examine a patient the next day. One of those watch this space things, I think.

We recently started dissection, which has been a mixture of all sorts of things. In the labs, it's easy to forget that the person you're cutting away at was once a human being. Probably because the embalming process changes the way the body looks and feels, giving it a more brownish, leathery look. It doesn't really hit you until you're back outside the labs in the real world, and I think it just adds to the notion that when you're in a situation where you have to act you do act, and that's it. The thinking time comes later when you're talking to patient's relatives etc. Although you have to strike a balance between being respectful enough, but still having a sense of humour (or another mechanism to deal with what youre doing), because at the end of the day, it's still a job, and you'll have a long list of other people to deal with.

Life in halls is still fun. Despite the early-morning fire alarms and revolting food. (Oh yes, it started off as quite nice, even tasty. To lure us into a false sense of security of course. Then suddenly, you get to choose between black sludge, brown sludge or refried stir-fry). The social side of things has been on a plateau since I've been back at uni, mainly because I'm trying to keep funds under control, but rather unfairly, money just seems to be spent so quickly. I'll be graduating with a debt of around £30,000, but compared with some of my friends paying international fees (about £20,000 a year) I've come to appreciate that things could be a lot worse. Other than that, things are good, and I have about four hours of anatomy to get on with before ER starts. While I could stop watching due to the slight inaccuracies, I'm ashamed to say I need a Carter fix.


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