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Friday Mar 20, 2009

Body gossip

Until this week, I've been reading and listening to TheSite.org's Body Gossip article and podcast with a fair amount of distance. I've been assuming that this content relates to other young women and not me.

I'm a size 10, average height (although I have a lot of short friends who think I'm tall which is a bonus) and the only time I've ever really worried about the appearance of my body (other than primary school taunts for being lanky) has been when I've lost a shed load of weight during particularly stressful periods of my life. But, in hindsight, I've probably secretly enjoyed the comments I've had during those super skinny times. This in itself is disturbing. 

Aside from this, my reassessment of my place in the body gossip debate is because I've been invited to model for an Alternative Fashion Week shoot. This has really shattered my illusion that I have no qualms with my appearance.

Firstly, the designer (who I've yet to meet - I was recommended by a friend) sent me an image of his T-shirt's that featured illustrations of really tiny waisted models. I immediately freaked and messaged him saying I didn't think my figure was what he was looking for. He's told me not to worry saying the images were massively exaggerated. Phew!

Secondly, every time I eat any kind of junk food - you know a bowl of chips in the pub or a cheeky mars bar, I keep seeing flashbacks to some of the awful people on American's Next Top Model telling girls to shape up or ship out. For  the first time in my life, I've seriously considered eating carrot sticks for lunch a la Liz Hurley in the run up to the shoot. As if I'm not aware that crash dieting is ridiculous. But more to the point, why would I need to? Admittedly this has also made me think about my overall fitness, which can't be a bad thing, but such vanity is quite cringe worthy.

Thirdly, I've turned into that girl who does my head in asking all my friends: "Do you think I've put on weight recently, what if the photographer laughs me out of town?" As my housemate pointed out, if he does have an issue when he meets me, then that's certainly his problem not mine. You may be thinking: "Why put yourself through it?" I've asked myself that question, but I guess curiosity will always get the better of me.

So, although none of my concerns are really serious when considering some of the eating disorders and body worries that other people experience, it has really hit home this week that anyone is susceptible to irrational body worries. Bearing this in mind, I think it's really important that we continue to talk about body gossip topics and question attitudes in the media, among our friends and perhaps most importantly, the conversations we have with ourselves.

Posted by Helen ( 11:56 AM ) Link to this post  |  Comments[2]