Regular rejection
Question
I believe I'm very talkative and funny and some girls I know say I'm cute, but I've never had a girlfriend. I'm very shy on first meeting and I just ignore people that don't seem interested in me right away. I'm really worried about what girls think about me, especially those that turn me down. Can you help?
Answer
You're not alone in worrying about what people think about you. There's no way of knowing why people have turned you down in the past, but you mentioned you're shy and sometimes ignore people who don't seem interested. If you're not giving these people a chance then nothing will develop. If you're feeling anxious or insecure when you ask someone out, it's possible you almost expect them to turn you down and assume they're not interested when in fact their shyness might make them appear uninterested.
Everyone has their own way of dealing with, and sometimes trying to hide, insecurity. Some people cover it up by being the life of the party while others act as though they think they're better than everyone when the opposite is true. Try not to let your shyness get the better of you the next time you ask someone out or chat them up. Remind yourself that you need to be brave and hang around for a bit when you've made your interest clear to the person you fancy, in order to give them a chance to respond to you.
Everyone experiences rejection and although it can be terribly painful, don't let it discourage you. Have patience and courage and in time you'll meet that special someone.
Updated: 20/04/2006
Question answered by Our Relationship Advisors
