Eating aid
Question
My boyfriend has an eating disorder but won't admit it. I want to help him but don't know how to go about it. Can you help?
Answer
Understandably, you sound very concerned about your boyfriend and are keen to support him as best you can. It is good to hear you are there for him, although this must be hard for you too.
Unhealthy relationships with food can begin when food is used to cope with difficult feelings, such as boredom, anxiety, anger, loneliness, shame or sadness. Some people may do this without even realising it. When food begins to rule a person's life, whether in the form of compulsive or binge eating, or excessive dieting, a person's relationship with food can become dangerously unstable. This may develop into an eating disorder.
It can be difficult when someone does not want to acknowledge they have a problem. This can be hard to cope with, but gentle encouragement and talking about feelings can be helpful.
If he has not already done so, you may want to encourage your boyfriend to visit his local doctor (GP) who will be able to explore the options available to him and refer him onto more specialist services, such as a clinic or therapist. You could even consider accompanying him for extra support.
A talking therapy, such as counselling, may benefit your boyfriend. A trained counsellor or therapist will be able to assist him in identifying any underlying issues he may have which could be contributing to his situation. These may include elements of low self-esteem, depression or family and relationship problems.
For further support and information, you might like to contact the Eating Disorders Association helpline on 0845 634 1414. The organisation hosts a message board, where anyone who has experienced an eating disorder (either themselves or through someone they know) can share their stories and offer support to others.
Additionally, you or your boyfriend could call SANELINE on 0845 767 8000. This is a mental health helpline that offers confidential and non-judgmental support and advice.
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