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Hit and Ms


Mione

Mione, 21, is in her final year of university. She loves spending time with her friends, travelling, partying and expressing her opinions.

She didn't realise she had any feminist tendencies until the titles 'Mr' and 'Mrs' grabbed her attention.

I recently started a new module at uni about sexist language. In the first week we talked about feminism and whether we considered ourselves to be feminists. I wasn't sure what a feminist was but I said I thought men and women were equal and I couldn't really think of any situation where women were obviously oppressed.

How wrong could I be? Studying this module has opened up a whole can of worms for me and I now have strong opinions on issues I never knew I cared about.

It started when a girl in the class told us a story about a holiday with an ex-boyfriend. The hotel mistook her for having the title 'Mrs' instead of 'Miss' with her surname, which of course was different to her boyfriend's. So throughout the holiday it seemed as though she was having an affair with him!

What annoys me is that men would never have this problem. They are titled 'Mr' throughout their lives, never once having to reveal their marital status. Women on the other hand are expected to swap from 'Miss' to 'Mrs' when they are married - and note that 'Mrs' is just 'Mr' with a hidden apostrophe before the 's'.

The alternative to 'Miss' or 'Mrs' is 'Ms', but this can carry connotations about the woman who uses it, such as that she's a divorcee or a deluded feminist. Such assumptions should probably just be ignored, but you can see why some women just choose 'Mrs' rather than having to explain all the time.

The changing of surnames has also become a big issue for me. My boyfriend once said he wouldn't marry me unless I took his surname, which took me back slightly. He has since said it wouldn't matter so much as long as I was his wife, which is lucky because I've always thought that I wouldn't particularly like to change my name. I'd consider it almost like losing part of who I am.

"The changing of surnames has also become a big issue for me. My boyfriend once said he wouldn't marry me unless I took his surname, which took me back slightly."

Names are identity, after all. I was given my father's surname, which my mother also obtained after they married. This surname represented the family I was from; I belonged to my parents. If I were then to change it to my husband's at marriage, to me it would feel as though I then belonged to him. And I don't like the sound of that.

I'm not planning to get married any time soon, but if I ever do I feel I have some very important decisions to make.

It's amazing how a few class discussions have sparked some very strong opinions and made me notice things I never did before. The issue of names and titles is something that bothers me a great deal, as it might affect me personally in the future, but there are loads of examples of the way women are oppressed without us really noticing.

For example, 'Man' is used as a generic term; mankind, manmade, manpower - they're all used to refer to males and females. Even the word woman has man in it. How unfair is that?

I understand that there are women out there who don't have a problem with being a 'Mrs' or changing their surnames, or even with any other way in which women are considered to be oppressed, but studying this module has opened my eyes to the issues that surround us and helped me create my own opinions. I guess there's a little bit of a feminist in me after all.

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